Study of Ephesians

Week 19

Ephesians 5:22-32

 

If you have been a Christian for any length of time, you have probably heard snippets of these verses. “Wives, be subject to your husbands. Husbands, love your wives.”

 

I do not claim to be an expert, but I think it’s very beneficial to look at all of these verses to get a proper context and feel for what Paul is communicating here. (Oh, and let’s remember that Paul felt it necessary to address this subject while chained in prison.)

 

 It is helpful to recall that Paul has already given instruction on who these young Christians were in Christ. He established their value and identity in Christ in the first three chapters of Ephesians. Here, he continues his teaching on how they should walk in Christ, what their lives should look like because of a relationship with Christ.

 

“Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands.” Ephesians 5:22-24

 

To be “subject” means to subject yourself or place yourself under, as in submitting your preference to another, one under an authority.

How? Paul continues, “as to the Lord.”

Being subject or placing yourself under submission does not have anything to do with identity, worth or value. Paul is instructing them on their role within a covenant relationship, marriage, not their value.

Subjecting ourselves to our husbands is not a license to be abused, neglected, diminished, minimized, or walked over.  We know this because we have the whole counsel of scripture.

Let’s look at Colossians 3:18-19, Galatians 3:28 and 1 Peter 3:1-6.

 

All of these passages speak to the roles of both wives and husbands.

Ironically, all are laced with a spirit of mutual love and submission.

 

Let’s continue to look at what Paul teaches in our focus passage.

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her; that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. So husbands ought to also love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself.” Ephesians 5:25-28

 

How many times is the word, “love” used? 

Several, right?

On each occasion, the word “love” pronounced “agapao” in the Greek, meaning to actively do what the Lord prefers, operating in His power and under His direction.

I personally think of someone who sets aside his own rights for the one he loves, his wife.

 

Remember another occasion where Paul spelled out what love looked like?

1 Corinthians 13:1-13

Paul placed a huge amount of responsibility on the role of a husband.

 

However, Paul wanted to drive home an even bigger picture. What does the Bible compare the union of a husband and wife to? Yes, the church.

“For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body.” Ephesians 5:29-30

 

Wives are to be subject to their husbands “as the church is subject to Christ.” Ephesians 5:22

Husbands are to love their wives “as Christ loved the church.” Ephesians 5:25

 

Paul adds this in Ephesians 5:32, “This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.”

 

Christ Himself played the greatest role, subjected Himself to the greatest level and demonstrated the greatest love that is immeasurable. He died on a cross, blameless, for our sins.

 

He could have held onto His rights as God, but He chose to yield His right to God’s plan. That is not only how we should operate in our marriages and in our homes, but how this should pour over into our lives with others. That is the cause of Christ, to strengthen the church through respect and love so that a dying world will be drawn to Him.

 

Jesus said, “This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you, Greater love has not one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.” John 15:12-13

 Question for discussion (your email is never posted or shared)

Why do you think that so many women struggle with the admonition to “submit” to their husbands?